The Pokeman of Pokemon
Name Pokeman
Sex Male
Species Human/Pokemon (Pokeman)
Occupation Pokemon Trainer/Kotaro's faithful servant
Friends Ace Detective, Kotaro, Yoshifan, Master Spaz, DBG, Ryth (at times), Piki, Crazy7, Milo, everyone else
Enemies Ryth (at times), all bronies

Pokeman is the happy-go-lucky Pokemon fan we all know and love. Like everybody else, he started off posting things like "ha ha I win!" and "looks like I won again", but eventually all of that stopped and the thread turned into the magical place of bronies and death we all have come to love. He left for a while in May when his computer broke because the thread was so active that he couldn't keep up with it on his 3DS. He started posting things like "hi" and "I'm ALIVE" and whatnot during the winter months of 2012, then officially returned in January. Now he's back to enjoying the wonderful black hole that is LPTPW. And everybody loves him! :D


Pokeman is the biggest Pokemon fan on the LPTPW thread. He is an author of a seemingly never-ending story called "The Story". In it are many characters, including a guy by the name of Zack Hakton, an epic hacker like those in MKW. He causes problems for everyone, even those in the LPTPW thread! Zack Hakton serves an important role: he is Pokeman's assistant of sorts! Now back to Pokeman. Pokeman happily serves under Kotarō and is his #1 sidekick-kun. He follows Kotarō around and tries to get others to join them in their quest for... something, though it's mostly for the milkshakes. It is also unknown if he is a brony or not. Sometimes he hates them, other times he likes them. I guess he goes both ways. That's the power of LPTPW peer pressure. TCJ seems to be able to brainwash him into loving ponies... Also, a fun fact: in the very beginning, he enjoyed trying to eat people. He... doesn't really do that much now, though. He has been around for a few of the LPTPW adventures, but most of them he unfortunately missed.

Appearance Edit


Pokeman full body

Pokeman looks exactly like Ethan from the Gold/Silver/HeartGold/SoulSilver Pokémon games. According to him, it's because "Just because I can morph into any Pokémon I want, it's not always fun." He also claims to be a Ditto most of the time.

Personality Edit

Pokeman is usually a happy little Pokeman. He doesn't tend to get mad very often... unless he starts losing on MKW. Then he gets a little testy. When fights break out in the LPTPW thread, he usually just sits back and watches everything unfold. He's not that into violence. However, when called upon by Kotaro, Pokeman is willing to do whatever is necessary to help him out. He'll even kill himself if ordered to! He's very loyal. If you take away his pie, he might try to kill you. So, uh... don't do that.

Powers and AbilitiesEdit

  • Summoning: A summon card allows Pokeman to summon Zack Hakton and make him appear right on the spot. He has abilities that can allow him to destroy everyone with Hax and Zinventions and whatnot. He's immortal and he possesses all the qualities and abilities of MKW hackers (infinite items, floating, slow-mo hax). When talking about strength, Zack Hakton's power is equal to (and is sometimes higher than) Ryth's power. Unfortunately, he is completely useless on Friday the 13th, as that is the day when his hacks don't work.
  • Morphing: He has the ability to morph into any Pokemon he pleases. When not morphed, he looks like the male Trainer from Pokemon HeartGold/SoulSilver. With this great power... comes even greater epicness...
  • German Wrath: Thanks to his numerous encounters with several dangerous ladies. Pokeman has learned how to copy abilities. One of these is the power of German Wrath, which he got from dealing with Sarah Radish, the epic German lady who acts like his “wife” of sorts. He summons all his hatred and focuses it into the German pit of his soul and releases all the power in one sudden burst of flames. If you are burned by them, you will ultimately die a painful, German death filled will people saying a bunch of words in a language you don't know. This will forever make you think, "what are they SAYING?!" Very effective on most peeps, though not so much bronies.
  • Substitution: Much like a Pokemon using Substitute, Pokeman can swap himself out with another person or a stuffed doll in his image. The substitute he summons is extremely dangerous and will explode upon extreme contact, such as fierce hugging. Any ponies/bronies in the area will also trigger the explosion, and they will be the ones affected the most. Sometimes, his substitute will look like Zack. If this happens, RUN. It will explode like a nuke!
  • Flaming Kick: Yet another ability Pokeman copied from a character in The Story. This attack is a Flaming Kick, and he copied it from Sarah Radish. It is a fiery kick filled with fire and pain. Pokeman transfers all of his energy into his leg, which becomes engulfed in flames, which then allows him to kick the foe/brony in the FACE. The damage done varies between his mood & the Pokemon he has morphed into, but it will never be lower than 150. It doesn’t really require all that much energy, so he is able to use it quite often.
  • Flamethrower: An ability Pokeman copied off of a character in The Story. This attack is a powerful Fire Blast in the form of a flamethrower, which he copied from FlamDawg Disco. He can use this attack to fry any brony in the thread at the time of use. It's also great for cooking the PERFECT toast.
  • Shadow Clones: Pokeman posses the unique ability to make several shadow clones of himself or anyone/thing around him. He can use this tactic to instantly create an army with one snap of his fingers. Sometimes the clones will look like shadows, and other times you won't be able to tell them apart. Unfortunately, the clones possess only 1/2 of his full power, meaning that they're pretty weak and fairly easy to take out. Just don't get caught in a swarm.
  • Stalling Power: Pokeman is the GRAND MASTER of stalling. He can stall basically anyone using any methods necessary. His famous method of stalling is responding to anything with "why?" thus resulting in an endless loop. He's really hard to get past.
  • Brainwashing Song: Thanks to dealing with lots of insanity in The Story, Pokeman has learned how to brainwash others with a song of insanity. When others hear it, they will go insane and attempt to kill themselves. Pokeman cannot sing this song by himself, so he sings a duet with Zoey Hakton (who kills herself at the end of Season 4 because of too much insanity). No one can resist the power of this song, which means you're royaly screwed.

Weapons Edit

  • Dark Taco: A powerful weapon in the shape of a taco! It's insanely powerful and should never be underestimated. More info to be added later...


  • Crystal Fist: It is a powerful punching weapon made out of crystal. More info to be added later...
  • Starbolt: A mystical item that possesses great power. It is simply a cross between a star and a lightning bolt, creating a star with electrical properties that has electricity flowing from its five tips. According to Dennis Sparks (the original wielder), you can describe the Starbolt as, "It goes BZZZZZEEENNNGTPBBBT ANDTHEBIGVILLIAN!!!" Yeah, just like that. It is a very powerful item. One microscopic piece was able to destroy half the world and rock several parrallel universes.

Quotes Edit

Yepper pepper!


I like pie.


All hail the pie man!




Cola cola cola cola cola!


I ain't doin' no that, so...




But you're just a Pokeman.


Like, fo serious.


So I heard you can like f-f-f-f-f-fly n stuff.


Pokemon man?! How RUDE!!! *Uses Hydro Pump*


Trivia Edit

  • Pokeman was once seen as a banana during an adventure. He hopped all around Fin's bed, then was beaten by ham toppings and he died. Apparently, ham toppings can kill him and cola revives him.
  • He is the grand master of pie, and his old clanmates from DT always called him "Pieman".
  • He is an extremely talented mansion/castle designer.
  • He loves stealing people's shampoo.
  • When he starts flipping tables, he can't stop.
  • Sometimes he bursts into flames for no apparent reason whatsoever.
  • He is the grand master of stalling.
  • He is very perverted.
  • He used to be in a bromance with Kotaro.
  • He will do whatever is necessary to save Kotaro's life.
  • He seems to currently be on Ryth's side due to his threat to kill Kotaro.
  • He will always wuv Kotaro <3
  • He apparently cannot be defeated thanks to him copying Zack Hakton's immunity.
  • Ryth's attacks seem to do less (if any) damage to him than the others. He is usually unaffected by all of Ryth's expert-level attacks.



Zack Hakton

Zack Hakton


File:Pokeman's Battle Theme (Ryth's Army)

Pokeman's Brainwashing Song

Pokeman's Brainwashing Song